Something magic happened today. My colleague and I went the food court to eat a Big Mac because we needed to do some research for a brief. (Yes, seriously!) After he and I parted ways, I turned up a side street to return to work when I spotted a tall man unlocking his bike. He was long and slim and had nice green eyes (I think) and he seemed to be looking at me too. I was wearing a lot of beaded necklaces and giant, beaded earrings I bought from the Senegalese man in Peel station—the outfit was really pulled together with beaded heels. Anyway, he continued to coyly walk his bike alongside me and I returned a few glances.
I crossed the intersection and so did he. I saw in the reflection of an office window that he was locking his bike up again and I continued to walk up the street not looking back, feeling a little shy, and also strong, telling myself that if he was really pursuing me, he could continue to pursue and I would continue to strut. I was at an intersection when he caught up to me and said, "Sorry, do I know you from somewhere?"
I laughed so hard, "No, I don't think so."
He nervously fidgeted, "Yeah lamest line ever but um, yeah, you're HOT..." and I blushed. I BLUSHED. I can't believe I blushed. I don't think I've ever blushed in that way. I felt it. I felt my own shyness and quietness and tenderness rising up and showing itself on my cheeks. This was not a shame blush but a shy blush.
"...man I sound like I'm 16, which I'm not! I'm 31 actually and, well, do you think we could maybe get a coffee sometime? Or a drink or something?"
I was laughing, he was shaking.
"Are you like married or have a boyfriend?"
"No, I'm single."
"Cool! Cool me, too, I'm single," he shows me his naked left ring finger.
"Cool." I'm smiling and covering my mouth (this is weird habit I've kept maybe because I'm afraid of the power of my own voice and the loudness of my laugh and also because I had braces in late puberty).
"My name is Carmen."
"Chris." We shake hands. I give him my number and see how his hands are trembling. I'm smiling a lot.
"Thanks for being brave."
"I almost wasn't."
Then we part ways and I'm amazed that maybe, maybe I'm finally beginning to be available.